Case Study - Lara Siazon
SF Neighbors Deliver Food and Positivity to House-Bound 80-year-old
On Memorial Day weekend every year, Lara Siazon would step out on her porch and wait for the Carnaval parade to pass by. For 40 years, she’d wave at the people below from her 1902 Victorian home in the Mission district. Lara has lived in the same house since she came to San Francisco from the Philippines 50 years ago, with her husband - a bus and taxicab driver - four teenage daughters, and an 8-year-old son. But since Covid, she’s been watching the Carnaval through her window. “She keeps to herself”, says her grandson, Thomas Anicete, a realtor in Sacramento, “She doesn’t drive. She used to walk to the market on Mission Street, but that was a long time ago.” Daveea Whitmire, a former neighbor and Founder of Third Parent, remembers the food she used to cook. “She always had food,” he recalls, “Filippino food - rice with ground beef, stir fry” Now, at 80, getting up and down the 2 flights of stairs to her unit is too hard for Lara. “She’s still scared of Covid”, says Thomas, “She has a lot of health issues; asthma is just one thing out of many. Any one thing and she could get sick and have to go to the emergency room. She still doesn’t go out of the house.” “Covid was a challenge for everybody. I was a bartender for 10 years when Covid started, and I got laid off from my job. I transitioned to real estate. I was one of the lucky ones.”
Depending on Favors from Busy Neighbors and Out-of-Town Family
None of Lara’s family lives in San Francisco anymore. Most are in Sacramento, so getting groceries to her was hard. Family members would “ping-pong” off each other and take turns making the hour and a half drive to San Francisco. “There was so much going on”, Thomas says, “Everyone had their own lives. People would call, “My kids would have this and that going on. Are you going to do it this week?” It was really tough. Financially, it was a hardship, with inflation. Everybody was trying to make it for themselves.” “When she didn’t have access to anything, she’d try to ask one of the other tenants in the units above and below. But my grandma is a prideful person. She’s like, I don’t want to depend on them to do it for me. She understands everybody’s busy.” At the beginning of Covid, Thomas found out that Daveea was running a food pantry through an organization he started, and he mentioned his grandma’s situation to him. He had known Daveea since he was 14.
Reconnecting with an Old Mentor
“Daveea was a mentor to me in San Francisco. I was mischievous in my adolescent years”, he laughs. “He was an older figure I used to see outside, at the park or hanging out. And he would always try to guide me in the right direction. When you’re younger and you see somebody that you respect, and they try to point you in a direction, it resonates with you. Daveea would see me and stop, talk to me, see what I had going on, what I was doing in school. He’d ask me, “Could you be doing better? Should you be doing this?” Very big brother-ish.” As time went on, they lost touch, but later reconnected through social media. “I wasn’t really surprised when I found out what he was doing with his non-profit, having resources for people and helping people out. That’s always been the type of person he was. From my point of view, it was a very organic thing, how he transitioned into it. He’s been doing it for a long time.” Thomas took up Daveea’s invitation to volunteer at his non-profit, Third Parent Family. That’s when he grasped what Daveea was doing with his organization.
A Community Coming Together
At the volunteer site, sometimes they have pizza. Sometimes a DJ is playing old school hip hop or other family-friendly music. Third Parent has a partnership with a pizza shop that likes the work they do. If people want a slice, they give them a slice. People come from all parts of the city - Asians, blacks, Russians - all getting along and being respectful. “It’s the culture, the vibe,” Thomas smiles, “Everybody’s in a good mood. It’s just a good time, everybody’s just there chillin’. You got the music, you’re just going along with the flow.” People can come to pick up groceries, or if they’re not able to get there, volunteers will deliver groceries to them. But it’s the warmth from the volunteers that means the most to the people they serve. “It might be a flower in the bag, it might be a note with a flower, saying you’re beautiful. These are uplifting things, and when people are going through these times, sometimes, that’s all it takes. Positive energy spreads. It goes such a long way”, Thomas says. “My grandma sends me these text messages like, “Tell your friend thank you! Oh my gosh. Make sure you tell your friend! She goes emoji-crazy. She puts all the flowers, the kisses, the hugs,” he laughs, “Fresh vegetables! Thank you so much, it’s good for my health!” I can’t even express how huge it’s been for my family. I can’t praise Daveea enough. He’s helped me and my family a lot.” Thomas encourages people to reach out to Third Parent. “Just reach out. Don’t be too prideful; it’s a no-judgment zone. The resources are there. You just have to let people know. Sometimes, it takes for you to be vulnerable. Everyone goes through these things. Once you do, you realize how many other people are in the same situation.” “It’s such a great thing for the community”, he says, “At the site, it’s from A to Z, all different types of people from all different backgrounds: it might be someone who’s homeless; it might be someone who works at Google. At the end of the day, everybody’s there for the same reason: to help somebody. Everyone’s there together, united, for the same cause. It’s worth checking out, just seeing the process behind it, seeing everything come together. It’s pretty amazing. It’s a beautiful thing.” Or, as Lara would say, 🌸 🌹 😘 ❤️ 💕🥬 🙏 🤗 �